Guaranteed Two Phrases NEVER before uttered in the same sentence

May 28, 2005 by Steve Peifer

My life has had lots of surprises since 1998, but even my most optimistic friends would not have predicted this:

I won a full ride to Harvard.

You would not believe how NATURALLY this can be inserted into a conversation:

Drive Through Window Guy: You want a double cheeseburger and a Diet Coke?
Me: Did you say something about Harvard?
DTWG: No.
Me: I did get a full ride scholarship to Harvard.
DTWG: Do you want fries with that?

We live in an age where people get too much information, so I don’t mention that the class is only for a week, and that the scholarship was obviously based on need, not merit. Why overload people?

My wife, who the term `long suffering’ was invented, has grudgingly accepted my plans to have t-shirts made for the whole family. She has drawn the line at tattoos.

family_2005-05.jpg

Speaking of my dear one, her birthday is Monday May 30th. Would you call her on her cell and wish a happy birthday or email her? We go back to Kenya in about two months; it’s MUCH cheaper to call her when we are here.

Your pal,

Steve